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Week 1

Welcome to Week 1 of our Spring 2022 outdoor session! This year is going to be great playing on the turf fields at Kevin T Keane Sports Park at Nardin. I hope that you all had time to read over my preseason predictions and enjoyed the analysis.

As a reminder, each week I will write about ALL the games and do my best to highlight as many players and moments from the week. With no football yet it will be a bit difficult to pick this week's games but here it goes;


Do 6 teams really have byes this week? Is it fair to make 2 teams play? Will they have a leg up on the competition by getting out there earlier or will the cooler, April weather cause issues? It will be interesting to see on Saturday how it plays out.

Tap Dat Pass +16 @ Can't Two Hand Touch This

The only game in D1 features the fall D2 champs, Can't Two Hand Touch This and the undefeated fall D3 champs that made the leap straight to D1 in Tap Dat Pass. I like the odds here and have a feeling Tap Dat Pass will be in over their heads against a team with much more chemistry, talent and speed. Prediction: Can't Two Hand Touch This wins 52-22


A fun slate of games featuring some of the top preseason picks and several double headers for D2 this week. League legends Brian, Marty and Kelly highlight what most likely will be the tightest division this Spring.

GUCCI +13 @ Totes

The favorite to win the title, Totes takes on a team with the coolest jerseys in the league. I like the matchup here and think that Kelly and her crew could spell upset for Adam and his. Will Totes have new uniforms themselves? If they do, they win. If they don't then the Gods take the W scoring 8 every time down the field. Prediction: Totes wins 44-28

Touch Football Mafia +4 @ Just Get Open

Both QB's in this game are slow and enjoy getting sacked, but Brian has been getting sacked a lot longer than Steve and has Dave to throw to. Will Just Get Open be able to slow down Rylee, Kayla and Laura and prevent the gender TD's? I don't think they can but Touch Football Mafia won't be able to stop Des and Caitlyn either. Prediction: Just Get Open wins 40-38

Touchdown There @ Go Deep +12

Will Tony have a full roster by Saturday according to league rules or will they continue to play with 6 or 7 players each week? How will Go Deep feel after their horrible odds in the preseason write up? Lots of questions here but one thing is certain, nobody can keep up with Zach and that is the difference. Prediction: Touchdown There wins 52-16 & Tony almost gets tossed

GUCCI +2 @ Clutch Genes

Can a former D2 champion really be underdogs in their first two games of the season? I think so and Karon will have his defense playing man to lock down the shorter throws of Kelly. Courtney and Melissa of Clutch Genes will be two of the best females in the division and will immediately make a name for themselves against GUCCI. Will the Kanes show up to ball or will the kids force one of them to sit out? Prediction: GUCCI wins 34-30

Just Get Open @ Touchdown There +4 (Game of the Week #1)

Double headers for both of these teams week 1 and the second of their games for both. Touchdown There plays fast and wreckless and never seem to tire but John will have his squad confident after their win earlier in the day. I encourage you to stop over and watch this game if you are hanging out or in between games as you will see a high scoring, fast paced game! Prediction: Just Get Open wins 48-47 and Tony gets tossed, but only for a series


Just 4 games this week, but all teams except Lava Covered Ninjas take the field. Some good matchups here with Laces @ Goatsack and 4th & Schlong @ Still Running and blowout potential with North Buffalo Knights taking on It's for Fun.

Laces Out @ Goatsack EVEN

Would you rather have mobile, speedy Brandon with limited experience at QB or slow but wise veteran Andy? I'm taking neither but Laces Out boasts a better roster of talent and Goatsack is really just here for fun, right? One thing Andy does well is use his females effectively and spreads the ball out. I think that is the difference in this game and I heard rumblings of Goatsack holding team practices in the offseason...for drinking, but still they got together. Prediction: Goatsack wins 36-35

Suite D +12 @ The Hulks

The question remains who plays QB for The Hulks? Where is Dave? They are facing a former Division III QB (like the REAL D3) in Clay and he doesn't care who takes the field against him. The question will be if his new roster can click week 1 and I don't see that happening. Prediction: The Hulks win 28-18

North Buffalo Knights @ It's for Fun +20

What a spread! Is that right? Yes, because the Knights have Alexis and It's for Fun doesn't. I want to see Mekker seriously hand the ball off just once in the I-formation.....please, just once. Mekker will send his team the championship picture from the Game On! website before the game in their group text to pump them up and Austin unfortunately cannot do that for his team. Prediction: North Buffalo Knights wins 36-22

4th & Schlong +8 @ Still Running

Captain Sean of 4th & Schlong is hoping to be able to change his profile picture this session with a new championship as they run into a tough team week 1 against Still Running. Jordan and Alan love their Saturday football and will pump the brakes if they get up by too many scores in this one. I think that hurts them and 4th & Schlong wins in an upset. Prediction: 4th & Schlong wins on the last play of game 30-28

Golden Keg Division:

Another division with several teams having Week 1 byes, but still a full slate of games to enjoy. Will Darren and his crew be boozin or losing come end of day? Will Ritz ever ref again? Can Isaac manage all the newcomers AND find a QB? Will Mike of Balls Deep ever step up and ref since he is always so critical of the refs himself? Should be a fun day in the Golden Keg Division.

Trophy Wives @ Your Mom EVEN

Dustin and some of the "Balls Deep" winter session players hope to improve on their 2 win indoor session. Michael clearly still lives in the early 2000's by naming his team "Your Mom," or he didn't Google 'Cool football team names' before the season started. This will be a nice welcome to the league for his team as they take on another team still figuring things out. Prediction: Trophy Wives wins 20-12

Boozin and Losing @ All Razzle No Dazzle +8 (Game of the Week #2)

I love the matchup here and think this could be a candidate for game of the week. Can Dave get his squad playing together week 1? Why is there so much roster turnover with his teams? How many family members will be playing with him? Darren and his crew have two games Saturday with this being a nice warmup to get things going. Prediction: Boozin and Losing wins 34-25

Shattered Dreams @ Odoo +22

The largest spread of the day goes to the team with the largest roster. I hope that some of the 18 players on this roster know how to play coed two hand touch football or things could get ugly, quick. Chris is out for blood and will not hold back just because a team is new to the league and Keyshaun will remind ALL 18 players how good he is throughout the game. Good luck Angela and crew, I am rooting for you guys! Prediction: Shattered Dreams wins 36-6

Trophy Wives @ Ghosts of Meridian +6

The second of a double header for Trophy Wives, they could be feeling pretty confident with an earlier win but Isaac will be sure to be scouting as he is out there reffing all day. It is always challenging with free agent teams and I think they need a few weeks to figure out the QB position and build chemistry. Prediction: Trophy Wives wins 19-10

Balls Deep +2 @ Boozin and Losing

The two favorites to win the Golden Keg East division square off Week 1 in what could be a championship preview. Immediate Care frequent flier Savion comes back to help establish the deep threat with Andy. Will Darren guest pass some of his buddies from D1's Can't Two Hand Touch This to slow them down?.....I hope not. Balls Deep catches Boozin on their second game of the day after they have drank a few 24 packs and smashed some tables. Prediction: Balls Deep wins 29-26

Kitna Kids @ Show Me Your TD's +4

Kitna Kids have all the confidence right now and a team picture on the Game On! Facebook page like North Buffalo Knights. Show Me Your TD's does not, and probably won't after the season. I love that they stick around but at some point Christina has to add some more talent if they want to compete. Kitna Kids are my absolute LOCK to come out as the division champs and it's unfortunate that Show Me will be in their way Week 1. Prediction: Kitna Kids wins 36-17

So there you have it, all the Week 1 games with guaranteed results....I think. Some of you may laugh at what was written, some of you may be angry, some might not read it at all. What I do hope for is that you stay tuned throughout the season for more analysis, predictions and highlights from our league and that you write to me at

This week's "Extra Points" round out the write-up;

3-Point Conversion:

Why is there even a 3 point conversion? Don't the refs have a hard enough time keeping score as it is?

2-Point Conversion:

The weather looks nice for Saturday with highs in the 40's. The great thing about playing on turf is that weather really should not be an issue and the fields will stay the same Championship week as they were Week 1!

1-Point Conversion:

The teams that have double headers this week will be 1/3 of the way through the season by the end of next wisely to those teams that play 2 games this week, your season could depend on it. Think about that!

"The Manager"

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